Thursday, March 7, 2013

Awaken The Star Within You

Years ago I read a great book called "How to be a Star at Work" by Robert E. Kelley. This book became and continues to be one of the "100 Best Business Books of All Time" and the "#1 Career Book" ranked by The New York Daily News. The author makes the argument that "stars are made, not born". This is terrific news for anyone who is looking for ways to become a star at work.

Based on Kelley’s book, there are 9 breakthrough strategies you need to succeed. Here are his strategies and some of his ideas as well as my thoughts on how to awaken the star within you:

1. Take initiative. Look for opportunities to set yourself apart from others. Many employees don’t take initiative. It’s too much work, they are too busy doing their job or they have become complacent. High performers go the extra mile consistently. Initiative is what many employers and recruiters look for in new hires, yet it is so rare to find in the workplace. Take initiative by taking on additional responsibility above and beyond your current job description. Look for ways to help coworkers or the department with specific goals or projects. Don’t be afraid to take some risks by taking initiative.

2. Become a good networker. It is said that we are only 4-5 people away from anything we ever want to be, do or have. A good network can help you fill in the gaps. You don’t know everything. But if you have a good network of people to draw on, you can usually find someone in your network to help you, or at least someone who knows a person that can help you.

3. Excel at self-management. Self-management isn’t about being super organized. It’s about evaluating which activities are important vs unimportant and then balancing those against the urgent vs not urgent. It’s about taking control over your own career path by developing a plan and connecting yourself to the work you most enjoy and that benefits the company. Stars figure out how to leverage their talents and add value to their organizations. Increasing personal effectiveness and efficiency is important.

4. Build perspective. I have a metaphor I love using with my clients around gaining more perspective. I have them think about a hockey game in an arena. As the hockey player you are focused on moving the puck, passing the puck, scoring, etc. The action is quick and very narrowly focused. The game moves quickly. Removing yourself from the player position to the coach position on the sidelines, you are able to gain a broader perspective of what is going on in the game. The game slows down, the view is broader and you are able to think more strategically about what should be done. Now moving to an observer position high in the stands, the game slows down even further. You are able to gain even more perspective as you can see not only the game and the coaching but also the statistics and anything else going on in the periphery. Much greater perspective and a much bigger viewpoint. As you awaken your star power, gain perspective on not just what you do, but what is going on around you and how that impacts your job, department and the company as a whole.

5. Build followership. Followership focuses on relationships you have with leaders and people who have power and authority over you. To be a good follower, you need to know how to lead yourself. Good followers have focus, commitment and build competence and credibility as a way of influencing others in the workplace. They maintain an honest conscience and a great deal of integrity. Their own ego is managed and controlled in order to work cooperatively with leaders.

6. Be a leader. Not just with people you formally lead already. Be a leader amongst your peers and colleagues as well as others. As a leader amongst your peers, you should look to be respected for your knowledge, expertise and proven judgment. You especially want their respect in the area of people-skills. Demonstrate that you care about people and your colleagues.

7. Be a team player. As a strong team player you can contribute by making sure the team knows and understands its purpose, gets the team’s job done and by paying attention and contributing to the group dynamics in a constructive and positive way.

8. Increase your organizational savvy. According to Kelley organizational savvy is defined as: "the ability to manage competing workplace interests to promote an idea, resolve conflicts, and most important to achieve a goal." The organization can be a political minefield so it’s important to be savvy. Find an organizational mentor who can help you maneuver through the organization. Build and nurture solid relationships and increase your personal credibility.

9. Become effective at persuasion. Impact and influence skills are key to getting to desired outcomes. It’s important to understand your audience and tailor your communication to them. Remember resistance is a sign that you haven’t built enough rapport.
Linda Cattelan is a Professional & Life Coach, Certified Trainer & Master Practitioner of NLP and a Contributing Author of The Power of Women United an inspirational book on networking. If you are interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be in any area of your life, join our mailing list at http://www.resultscatalyst.ca/?page=newsletter Receive valuable information on these topics and regular updates about upcoming events and workshops.

Reading Body Language Gestures

Those wanting to learn to read body language would do well to consider how much they already, innately, know about body language. Take a gander at this list of the most common body language gestures and you’ll find that you know more about body language than you thought.

The Most Common Body Language Gestures Leaning Forward: Let’s start with an extremely simple body language gesture. Leaning forwards is the universal sign of interest. If you’re talking to someone and they lean forward, you know they’re listening to you.

Leg over Chair Arm: A person witting with their leg over a chair arm is showing indifference. When talking to someone, if they do this it means they’re not interested.

Head Shake: Of course, you already know that shaking your head means "no." But did you know that if you speak while shaking your head, your listener is more likely to disagree with you (that’s right; you shake your head, they disagree).

Nodding your Head: Nodding your head is a sign of agreement, but more than this, if while you are the one talking you nod your head, your listener is more likely to agree with you. Weird.

Holding Hands Behind Head: A person holding their hands interlocked behind their head is showing that they feel superior. It’s a classic sign of arrogance. Don’t do this, it will make people dislike you.

Chair Straddling: When people straddle chairs they are showing aggression. They use the front of the chair to protect their own body while they try to dominate a conversation. This definitely is not good social etiquette!

Legs Spread: When a guy stands with his legs spread he is deliberately showing strength and dominance. This is a classic body language gesture used by alleged "alpha males." 
Sucking a Pen: Sucking a pen can only mean one thing; insecurity.

Tucking head into Shoulders: Another sign of insecurity and fear, we tuck our head into our shoulders when we feel worried or concerned.

These are some of the most common body language gestures and you likely knew a lot of their meanings already. In other words, you already have an intuitive ability to read people’s body language. Trust your gut instinct when watching people: what your instinct tells you is usually true.
Paul Harrison is author of the Body Language Guide on Arolemodel.com, your definitive source for learning to read body language and nonverbal communication. Discover the meaning of people'd body language gestures today.

Why You Need to Have a Success Coach Like Marshall Sylver

People typically think that building wealth like millionaire success coach Marshall Sylver is beyond reach. You may not be able to fathom it happening, because the idea is beyond anything you have ever seen. You might not ever have met even one millionaire.

This demonstrates the key point in finding a mentor and getting some success training. Most of us weren't taught to be free thinkers, to seek to expand our sense of what is possible for us and to grow in previously unimaginable ways. Instead, most of us have learned to remain within certain limits, to seek some kind of regular employment and settle for an ordinary existence.

Qualified success trainers and mentors offer much, much more. They mentor people to move toward wealth and freedom. The question for you, then, becomes "Do you really want to settle for less?" What if you are determined to break free from your ordinary life and create a life that's remarkable? For this to occur, you have to move into new terrain.

You probably realize from experience that it's unwise to head out into unknown territory with no roadmap. If you long to become very effective and wealthy, it's also foolish to head out into the unknown without a guide. A millionaire success coach can guide you into glorious places you never even dreamed about because you've never gone there before. You may not even have a friend or relative who has been there.

Fatal False Impressions About Being a Millionaire Success Story

To become wealthy and successful, just about everyone has to cope with these kinds of thoughts.

1. It's not possible for you. To this, Marshall Sylver responds that becoming a millionaire is not hard, it's just different.
 2. There isn't enough time. Those who already work longer than they want to work think they can't possibly work hard enough to earn a seven-figure income. To develop the idea that it's not difficult, but it's different, {you first need to change your approach. Instead of thinking in terms of exchanging time for dollars, rich people exchange value for dollars. By providing high value, you can generate a much larger income in much less time.

3. You aren't good enough. If you believe that millionaires are more intelligent, have to have a degree, or have to be born in better families, think again. The truth is that people with less intelligence, less education, and less social prominence have as much of a chance to become millionaires as anyone else. The key is in your thinking. If you believe you can, you can.

The Amazing Value of Success Mentoring and Training

The overriding truth is that we live in a favorable universe. If you are seeking a greater life, then it is possible. You are connected with an infinite intelligence whose goal is to help you to have everything you require to live fully even more than you do. A millionaire success coach can help you to shift your thinking about who you are, your true intelligence, and what you can do.
It's normal to want to have more, live more, and become more. You were born to live abundantly and to grow. It might be that some unsuccessful and not too prosperous people around you say that it's ridiculous to imagine that you can break free of your present situation. But do they actually know? If you want to hear the real story, you have to listen to a millionaire success coach like Marshall Sylver. Connect with a person who has the experience to help you to do what you hope to do.
CLICK HERE to find out a success mentoring and training opportunity that makes it possible to earn as you learn now.

Also, if you want more keys for getting rich, visit http://heartandsoulofsuccess.org/articles/.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com

Asking the Right Questions

Asking the Right Questions

There are many ways to get the right answer but only if you know the right question. The great motivational speaker Anthony Robbins had this to say on the subject: "Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers."

In our everyday lives and too often in the workplace we ask the wrong question and we certainly tend to focus on quantity versus quality when it comes to asking questions. There may indeed be no "stupid" questions but there are questions that can help get closer to the truth and others which pull you far, far away.

In general there are two types of questions. There are questions that seek to learn and questions that seek to judge or get a person to lean our way in an argument or dispute. Judging and leaning questions are really looking to assign blame, defend an already held position or move another person closer to our point of view. Learning questions however are actually looking for new information and facts and sharing responsibility to resolve or improve a situation.

Another way to look at questions is to categorize them as powerful or power- draining questions. Powerful or empowering questions might be like what might best work for you in this situation or when are you most effective? Power-draining questions might be what went wrong here or how could this have happened? You can see how one set or style of questions might produce a completely different answer and result.

If you really want to improve a situation or get information that can correct a problem it is much better to ask a question in a way that allows the person to actually give you something to work with rather than retreating behind the cone of silence or even worse giving you incorrect information. Many times this means asking the question in a neutral way that shows you are not on a witch hunt. That might mean prefacing your question with a comment like "I'm not blaming anybody.. I just want to know what went wrong." Then ask your question and watch as the tension drains from the other person's face.

The other major thing to focus on in getting the right answer is to actually listen to the person who is trying to answer your question. We have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Ask your question as neutrally or powerfully as you can and then wait and wait and wait for the answer. Don't ask another question while you're waiting. Don't try to pre-empt their answer. Sometimes people are just thinking or maybe they are trying to decide if they can trust you. 
Ask the right question, in the right way, and wait for the response. You just might get the right answer.

Mike Martin is the author of The Walker on the Cape, a Sgt. Windflower mystery.
Mike Martin is the author of The Walker on the Cape, a Sgt. Windflower mystery. www.walkeronthecape.com

Surround Yourself With Success

Successful people do one thing - they COMMIT. To themselves, to their dream, to the people they are here to serve and to the Universe.

When you are called into your greatness - there is an overwhelming desire to move into the work - you are passionate, excited, enthusiastic and filled with juice - you've got your goals in sight - your engines are revving and you are caught in the throes of a LOVE AFFAIR with your work!

Then like in all good relationships - the high-octane fuel of new love recedes and the time comes for you to settle in and do the regular work of feeding the fire of your passion and keeping it going. THAT is the PRECISE time that you need to surround yourself with others who are successfully - VERY successfully delivering their gifts to the world.

When your own initial burst of excitement has burnt itself out - you need friends, partners, mentors, colleagues, coaches, trainers, and masterminders to help you to continue to move forward into your becoming - into your dreams and into the service that you were born to deliver into the world.

This is the most important time to LOOK AROUND and to SEE exactly who you have in your life- are the people around you your cheerleaders? Are you surrounded by folks who want the very best for you? Do you have anyone on your team who can offer a CONSTRUCTIVE view of where you might have some (or even many) weaknesses in your plan? Are there people in your circle who have already succeeded in doing something similar to what you are trying to accomplish.

The birds are squawking outside my window this morning - crows I think - reminding me to remind you that "Birds of a feather flock together" - so take a GOOD LONG LOOK at who you are "flocking" with. If you are challenged to move forward in your work - perhaps you've been spending too much time with the naysayers and it's time to look elsewhere - to look to create relationships with people who you wish to emulate - to engage in activities that are going to grow you, expand your mind about what is possible and provide a container of mutual support within which to investigate just where you might need some additional help to strengthen your own areas of weakness.
Detach from Drama - drama just sucks up your life force - your energy and it makes you lose focus on what is truly important to you. If you are surrounded by a lot of drama - ask yourself - what within me is ready to die to all this so that I can actually create something beautiful, sustainable and transferable that will serve not only myself but also the people I am here to serve and perhaps even future generations. Who is out there that is doing what I want to do? Go out there and start "flocking" with them - sooner or later Success Rubs Off. Seriously!
In order to be successful in your business and empowered as a messenger you must feel safe speaking your authentic truth and able to powerfully & courageously present your point of view to the world. Please visit our website for a complimentary report - 3 Simple Secrets to Feel Safe Speaking When You Are Called to Be A Messenger: http://www.theempoweredmessenger.com Prepare to be Heard By Millions!

Forgiveness Does Not Minimize Wrongdoing

If you forgive someone, does that mean you downplay or minimize the wrong that was done to you? Does forgiveness mean you are letting someone off the hook or giving the person a free pass?

I often listen to Dr. Erwin Lutzer on the radio and he has a wonderful ministry called, "Running to Win." Recently, he was speaking on a series called "Suffering Wrong" and was talking about some of the reasons why people hold on to offenses and refuse to forgive. He said, "When you forgive, you do not minimize, you punt the ball to the Supreme Court."

That statement really resonated with me, especially the part about minimizing. Many women who I have mentored find it hard to forgive because they feel that in doing so they are minimizing, or downplaying, the wrong that was done to them.

The feeling is that forgiving lets the other person off the hook; they get a free pass, so to speak. Something about a free pass just doesn’t feel right. After all, if the person is not remorseful or did not "pay" for what they did to you, then you are letting them off the hook if you forgive them, right?

Actually, that is wrong.

Forgiveness should be granted for a number of reasons: in obedience to God, because we also want to be forgiven for our sins, and for the benefit of being able to heal and move forward. The notion that forgiving gives your offender a "free pass" is a lie that many people believe. Forgiveness is not about giving something away and then getting shortchanged on justice.
If you are not letting your offender off the hook, or minimizing what they have done to you, what exactly are you doing when you forgive them? Well, a part of what you are doing is just what Dr. Lutzer said. You are punting the ball to the highest court in the U.S., the Supreme Court, and that is a metaphor for our highest heavenly court, which is God. You are turning the problem over to God so that Christ may carry the burden, pass judgment and render justice. Psalm 37:28 says, "For the Lord loves justice," so you have the guarantee that you will never get shortchanged on fairness.

It is unwise to view forgiveness as letting someone off the hook or minimizing what they have done to you. Put forgiveness in its proper perspective. Forgiveness is not about what you give away and it’s not about downplaying wrongdoing. It’s about what you gain: freedom, peace of mind, a lightened heart and a renewed spirit.
Natacha Cann is a certified Life Coach, mentor and founder of The Healing Letters Project. The project encourages women to write letters of reconciliation to their family, friends and loved ones to make amends, seek forgiveness and repair broken relationships. www.thehealinglettersproject.com

Instant Forgiveness

No matter how badly someone hurts you, it is beneficial to forgive the offense instantly.

I have a friend, who I will call Pat, who owns her own business,. Pat just had a very bad experience with one of her female employees and had to fire the woman. Pat mentored her for the past seven years, taught her everything she knew, and even helped the woman build her own clientele. Within recent months, Pat noticed there was a change in the woman's behavior. The woman became disrespectful, cynical and less appreciative. Pat even suspected the woman was gossiping to clients about her.

Pat finally made the painful decision to sever ties. She changed the locks on the door and packed the woman's belongings in boxes. Pat later learned the woman was secretly building her own business and taking Pat’s clients with her, which explained her behavior. Pat wasn't hurt by the fact the woman wanted to move on, she was hurt by the manner in which the woman handled the situation (by being dishonest, disloyal and disrespectful). To add insult to injury, the woman wrote a check to Pat for moneys owed, but then put a stop payment on the check.

When you befriend someone, mentor them, and take them under your wings for seven years and they betray you in that manner, it is very painful. And the situation is more than just about feelings being hurt. This woman affected the overall health and financial wealth of Pat's business and also potentially jeopardized Pat's willingness to mentor other women in the future. Talk about being dealt a hard blow!

After sharing this story with me, I gave Pat a hug and told her I would keep her, as well as her offender, lifted in prayer. I asked Pat, "How are you doing? How are you dealing with all of this?" What came out of her mouth just amazed me. Pat said, "I already forgave her and I wish her well. I thought about taking her to court for the money she owes, but it's not even worth the trouble. I actually prayed for her. I have to let it go and focus on what I'm doing next. God has a plan for me." Pat also said she is not discouraged from helping and mentoring other women in the future, despite this bad incident.
I could see the hurt and pain on Pat's face, but I also saw her sincerity in giving the problem to God and letting Him deal with it as she focuses on what she will do next. Instant forgiveness does not get rid of the pain, but it instantly points your heart and mind in the right direction: on your future. For many of us, we are still stuck in the past, reliving bad encounters and painful experiences, or holding on to grudges and waiting for apologies, That;s just plain being miserable! If this is where you are today, I challenge you to pray about your situation and set your heart and mind on moving forward. Jesus said he came not only that we may have life, but that we may have it more abundantly (John 10:10). Seek your abundance in Christ and let God deal with the rest.
Natacha Cann is a certified Life Coach, mentor and founder of The Healing Letters Project. The project encourages women to write letters of reconciliation to their family, friends and loved ones to make amends, seek forgiveness and repair broken relationships. www.thehealinglettersproject.com